Thursday, April 9, 2009

He's Not Just Anyone

I'm down on my knees again tonight
I'm hoping this prayer will turn out right
See there is a boy that needs Your help
I've done all that I can do myself
His mother is tired
I'm sure You can understand
Each night as he sleeps
She goes in to hold his hand
And she tries not to cry
As the tears fill her eyes

Can You hear me?
Am I getting through tonight?
Can You see him?
Can You make him feel all right?
If You can hear me
Let me take his place somehow
See, he's not just anyone
He's my son
-Mark Schultz

I know that song is about a sick boy but most of it feels pretty relevant to me right now. I look at him and, while it's true that we look nothing alike, his heart feels as fused to mine as if we were conjoined twins. Certainly I cannot take his place. I understand that it would be awfully strange for a young guy to fight for custody of a 27 year old woman. I just wish that Matthew's future wasn't so up in the air. I know that, really, none of us knows what tomorrow brings but the uncertainty of Matthew's tomorrow seems so much more...uncertain.

So I lean on the fact that God's knows.


  1. Hey Lori- I have been reading your blog for awhile now. We both are Loma grads from '03. I just wanted to let you know that my thoughts are with you and your family. Sorry it took so long for me to comment!

  2. I know I haven't been commenting much, but just wanted to let you know that I am keeping up with your updates and thinking about you guys and praying lots! xoxoxo

  3. Hi Lori,
    Jim, Maddy and I are praying. I love that song you posted. It makes me cry when I hear it and now it will have even more meaning. Good reminder to pray when I hear it on KLOVE.
    P.S. I just set up a blog again with Amy's help and already forgot my password. It should be loser!