Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Awareness Week

This week is National Infertility Awareness Week and well, if you've been reading this blog for any length of time, you know how I feel about infertility. If you are walking or have walked the journey, you know how important advocacy is. If you've never been touched by the disease, I encourage you to learn more. For now I will give you just two reasons to make yourself aware of the physical, emotional and psychological effect that infertility has on your friends and family.

Reason #1

Reason #2

Obviously, my reasons look very different. Reason #1 is our biological answer to countless prayers and petitions that I would have a child. Reason #2 is our (contested) adopted answer to the same prayers. In our wedding ceremony, my father-in-law said we were coming together for the purpose of having a family (among other things--that wasn't the only reason he listed). Building our family has proven to be...uh...difficult. And there are so many things we can be doing. Like beating down the doors of the insurance companies for one thing.

Can you tell if those are Garrett's or Matthew's feet? I mean, obviously, they are baby feet...but was this picture taken in 2006 or in 2009? If you look closely, you can tell. I just find it amazing that it's hard to tell at first glance. You know, given their difference in pigment.

Hey, mom, I'm just going to rub this flower all over my brother, okay? Then he'll smell good instead of smelling like old spit up.

Quick, take the picture, he's losing me. Pretty soon he'll just move his arms altogether and I'll be forced to roll happily onto the blanket.

Can I tell you her secret? Usually I close my eyes and smile like a big giant goober. She got me laughing by telling me to say, "Poopie!" Since that is generally something she discourages me from saying, I'd like to submit that she's not being terribly consistent, which, as we all know, is rule number one of parenting.

I always look startled. I think it has something to do with my baby Einstein hair, my perpetually wide eyes, and my flared nostrils. What do you think?

Be aware of NIAW. If not for me, do it for them. They wouldn't be here if I'd never dealt with infertility.

Well, Matthew would be here. He just wouldn't be here. Which may happen anyway. You never know. Yes, I'm surly today. I'm fending off the feverish plague my son has been battling for three days. But I'd be better if you took a moment to look infertility in the face and vow never again to ask someone, "So, when are you gonna have a baby?"


  1. AMEN!!!!

    Michelle D.

  2. Well said! Adorable pictures!!!

  3. I love the startled look in those pics.

    I too hate the "when are you having another baby?" Especially when you've been trying and miscarried. That really sucks.

    Thanks for this post. So great in so many ways.

  4. I LOVE your last line. We've been trying for 4 years to have another child and my insurance agent always asks when we're going to get pregnant just brings it to the surface everytime.

    This was a wonderful post!

  5. Thank you for your blogs. You are an eye opener for some of us. Love Love Love your boys. They are too cute. And I never thought of it before but Matthew does look like a baby Einstein.

  6. I LOVE that picture of both of them laying on their bellies. It's the cutest thing ever!

  7. I'm not dating anyone nor am I married and I even get the "so when are you going to have a baby?" It sucks just as much for us single people. :) loved your post. beautiful, eye opening and honest.

  8. WOW.... Thank you.... The hardest thing that anyone would ask me is "when r you going to have a baby" we tried for 5 years we were blessed by the grace of god in 2005 with my son and then started trying almost instantly for the next we so wanted more children but life sometimes doesnt hold a full deck, we were blessed with our sweet princess in 2007 after many trys... and with help from modern medicine, we feel truely blessed but sad all at the same time we lost her twin in utero but are gretful for all that we have.

    Thank you for sharing your story and allowing others to understand how hard it truely is, this post was so touching.