Thursday, March 6, 2008

Accessorize With Abandon

So before we get to the important business of today's Red Thing, you should know that, concerning yesterday's post, I also thought the word was spelled cumberbun. All my life I swear I've been pronouncing it with two b's. I also, most certainly, do not end the word with a "d" sound. However, not knowing for sure if cumberbun was the actual correct spelling, I looked it up on and behold, it is cummerbund. And my world felt somewhat askew and much like my shoes were on the wrong feet. So, for those of you who have confessed, either on this blog or elsewhere, that you've gone your entire lives thinking that it's too, my friends, me too.

And now for an all new Red Thing. You should read this post first if you're new to The Red Thing. Although, I'm pretty sure that I know all six of you so I'm kind of gonna just off and run with the fact that I don't have any new readers. Anyway...

You just don't see enough people walking around in hand *muffs anymore these days. And you know what, I don't know why. There is no logical explanation. I mean, I get why no one wears them in Hawaii where every single day is tank top weather. Fuzzy hand warmers just don't compliment flip flops very well. I even understand why you don't see 'em in San Diego. It's pretty toasty there most of the time. But I live in Utah now and I gotta tell ya, I haven't seen a single one. Why aren't we rockin' the giant fuzzy hand warmers? They used to be such a sign of style and fashion. Maybe they're still big in Russia? I get that they can be a little pricey and what with the economy these days and blah blah blah. Apparently Hermes makes one one that totally doubles as a purse and you can bypass their two year waiting list and buy it on ebay for $9,495. Yah. You read that right. But for that price you get the original box and the original dustbag. The DUSTBAG people! Doesn't that make it worth your money? You should know, before you go bidding on such a gem, that it doesn't come with the tags so it may or may not be a knock off ...but the DUSTBAG! Don't forget about the DUSTBAG. Here is a picture though...
Or for $15 plus shipping and handling you can buy The Magic Scarf and make your own muff...

I know it doesn't come with a dustbag but you can't wear the Hermes Kelly Shearling Muff as a tie or a skirt, now can you? And I mean, the Hermes model does look a great deal more...fierce than I do. She's much more put together than I will ever be. Her hair is flawless and mine is all courtesy of the wind that likes to whip around between the Wasatch and the Oquirrh mountains. But her hand warmer doesn't scream, "Service with a smile!" If, you know, she were serving something to someone, somewhere. All I'm saying is that aside from the obvious financial perks, would you rather be friends with impeccable and snooty looking model lady with nearly 9,500 dollars on her hands or Hurry-up-and-take-the-picture-already-my-hair-is-on-a-journey-to-Park-City-without-me lady who is making wonderful use of The Red Thing for 15 dollars? I mean, really, my muff has so many functions it's paid for itself after just a few days.

Turns out that on the Magic Scarf website there is a video that shows several different functions of the Things. (And by several I mean four or five. Nothing like the plethora that you will see featured here.) At the very end of the video the narrator says, "Accessorize with abandon." And oh my gosh if that isn't my new motto for life!

*It should be noted that the author of this blog realizes that there are several definitions for the word muff. The definition that coincides with this particular post is "a thick, tubular case for the hands, covered with fur or other material, used for women and girls for warmth and as a handbag."


  1. I'm seriously laughing out loud. Glad you clarified definitions at the end there. It just made me laugh more.

  2. Yes, thank you for the clarification.

  3. Can I just say, maybe you should NEVER read my blog again. I'm all over the place, and mean, ALL OVER THE PLACE with my spelling. And I don't even care! But I do realize that scholarly people like you would probaly not sleep good at night after reading it. Sorry for the frustration. You've been so kind and forgiving. :o) I loved the boy in his tu-tu (I mean cumbberbbund) too tute. But you do take the cake with the hand muff thing-a-ma-jig. Very nice, very nice indeed.

  4. first things first - you have space between your thighs! i am jealous. next, after reading the title of your blog, i was prepared for it to be about accessorizing the thing. this just speaks to its versatility; not only can it be accessorized (think pins, buttons, BEDAZZLER, etc.), but it also is an accessory in and of itself. it just keeps getting better.