My Footprint Leaver

“Some people come into our lives and quickly go.
Some stay in our lives for awhile,
leave footprints on our hearts
and we are never, ever the same.”
-Anonymous

My move to Utah was made a hundred times easier by a footprint leaver. As a pastor's wife, I needed someone older and wiser who could be a friend, a confidant, a mentor. My footprint leaver is all those things and so much more. Today, my footprint leaver and her family said goodbye to the church they'd called home for 13 years. And though I hate to cry in public, and try really hard not to, I couldn't keep the tears at bay. I made it through their last day on the worship team because I was also standing up there singing and refused to blubber into the microphone. I made it through the service with her family behind me because I was determined not to cry. But when our church body joined hands to sing "Bind Us Together" I lost it. And I didn't even care. Okay, that's a lie. I cared a little. I really hate to cry in public.

Allison made a point of visiting me during those first few months of our ministry. She came to the hospital when Garrett had his Snouter surgery. She opened her home to me for countless lunches and her children became the surrogate big brothers and sister of my son. She planned our women's retreat with me last year. It was during those planning meetings that I really realized what I had in Allison. The wisdom that flows from that woman is incredible. I can only hope to one day achieve the knowledge and godliness that she possesses. There is so much that I can learn from Allison and, while I am so happy for her family (this move is a really good thing for them), I am devastated by my own loss. She's only moving two hours north. (Praise God!) The world isn't ending. Life will go on.

My footprint leaver wrote a letter of recommendation for us when we were listing with our adoption organization. When I got the word that we'd been picked I ran down the hallway at my parent's house screaming something unintelligible to my mom about how there was a birth mother who wanted to meet us. Then, of course, I called my husband. The first person, after him, that I called to tell was Allison. In such a short time she had become so much to me. I knew she'd share the news with the rest of the church and I knew that I wanted her to know. Right away. Yes, I have other very important family members but my mom was busy calling them. As Matthew's drama has unfolded, Allison's been right there praying for him, every step of the way.

I never had a sister and I never had an older sibling so I don't really know what it would have been like to have a big sister. But if I'd had one, I would have wanted her to be just like Allison. She took me under her wing. She loved on my sons. She helped me grow spiritually. She listened and shared and laughed and cried and prayed. She has been there for me in every, single sense of the phrase.

And in the end she left footprints on my heart and I will never, ever be the same.