Friday, July 31, 2009


Tonight we're having a women's slumber party at the church. Yep, that's right, we're putting on our p.j.s, watching movies, playing games, hanging out, and eating junk food. There will be prizes for different categories of pajamas.

I've never left Matthew overnight before. I hate when I leave my babies for the first time although, to be fair, I honestly can't remember the first time I left Garrett. I think he was about the same age. He may have been slightly younger. I left him with my parents. I'm sure he had a blast. I know that I am not technically leaving Matthew with someone else...he'll be with his father but it does pull at my heartstrings just a bit to think that I won't go pick him up in the morning. This got me thinking about what in the world I'll do if we lose custody of him. I cannot imagine that first day of not going to pick him up in the morning. I cannot imagine subsequent days. I wonder how many days will pass before I start remembering that he's not going to be there. I can't think about it for too long and I hope I never have to know what it's like.

We had our post placement exam today. If we weren't tied up in court, we'd be able to legally adopt Matthew in about four weeks. Oh how I wish we could. How I wish there was a period at the end of these adoption struggles.

But for tonight I will not worry about it. For tonight I will put on my pajamas and I'll head over to the church. Tonight I will try to channel my inner nine-year-old. I know she's in here somewhere, right where I left her, nineteen years ago.


  1. The Rock Star was 3 months old. You had something to go to down the hill. Maybe a PLNU play or something? We just decided to keep him. He did great, but you were at my house by about 9 am to retrieve

    This Sleepover will do you good. Are you going for the prize for most seductive? Oh wait, you're a pastor's wife. You must only wear flannel and turtle necks.

  2. She did wear her fleece one piece footed pajamas to church to advertise the sleepover. In July. I was sweating just looking at her. J

  3. I hope you enjoy every minute of your sleepover - just like I'm sure Matthew & Garrett will love every alone moment with their dad.
    Have a great time!

  4. Hey Silly, I thought for sure you were only one day older than me (and one whole year in school) which means you didn't say goodbye to your inner 9-year-old 19 years ago but only 18. Just saying. I mean what good is the wrinkle cream if we're going to go around telling people we're old ladies already?

  5. I was in 5th grade rocking out to Kool and the Gang and sporting my Jordache jeans when you were born. I was married when you were then that said nine year old, and by the time you yourself were in 5th grade - rocking out to No Doubt? - I had just embarked on a huge life change (losing my mom) and about to be bestowed with the best one yet (Chad).

    Even though a decade older, I look up to YOU so much and you are an inspiration in my life, my friend!

    Hope the sleepover was a fun one!

  6. Why do I get the feeling you will have absolutely no problem getting that 9 year old Lori dusted off and will be swirling in dual laughter and sheer enjoyment?
    Have a blast! You deserve every second of fun for being such a great momma to your boys!