This morning I had a doctor's appointment because, well, I've never had a skin check in my life and I didn't want to keel over one day and die of moles. I don't have ninety two million or anything but I thought it might be best to make sure I wasn't harboring melanoma in any of the ones I do have.
And then Doogie Howser walked in. Except he was a she. A little baby dermatologist. I guess I'm under the impression that doctors should always be older than me. This will be a problem if I live to the ripe old age of 92. But for real. I feel like really young people should only be allowed to be pediatricians. And it seems like they keep getting younger. Or is it that I keep getting older? In any case, she was very friendly and very professional. I did not get the feeling that she had been drinking at a sorority party until late last night.
And apparently, I am not dying of moles yet and any removal would be cosmetic and, therefore, cost me 95$ each.
Me: And what is the procedure?
Her: We numb the area with an injection. It's a lot like having dental work done. So you know when you've been given nova--
Me: I've never actually had a cavity.
Her: Really!? Well, you have very nice teeth.
Me: Oh. Thank you. (I really wasn't fishing for a compliment, I was just explaining that her example would be difficult for me to comprehend.)
Her: Well, so, it's basically just a prick near the area.
Then she continued to discuss the procedure and I continued to think about my precious 95 dollars and the fact that she said none of them needed to be removed. Then I thought, well, hey, why don't I just wait until I get a cavity and then convince the dentist or the dermatologist to give me a two for one...