Thursday, September 4, 2008

Slithery Update

Well, thankfully we haven't seen anymore baby snakes slithering around our house. It helps to know that I don't have to sleep with one eye open.

This morning I stopped at WalMart on my way home from MOPS and picked up a can of fish food because this morning the conversation went like this:

Me: I'm going to get fish food.
Troy: Okay.
Me: I don't want them to die.
Troy: Looks at me with a really strange look on his face
Me: Well. That is to say, I don't want them to die without a cause.

I determined that we might release the snake and be stuck with three goldfish instead because the snake seemed less than interested in those gilled suckers. This morning we watched him swim around in the water bowl. With the fish. We watched him lay his head on top of one of them and take a little cat nap. We saw them becoming close personal friends. We saw our future and it involved letting a snake go and asking for name suggestions for our new fish instead.

I fed the little goldfish and went about my afternoon. I just went to look at something in the kitchen and As Of Yet Unnamed Snake was sitting in his little terrarium. On the kitchen counter. Because I haven't figured out a good place to put him. I glanced into the water dish and discovered not three, not even two, but one fish swimming around. And then I saw another, dead on the rocks. And then I saw the lump in the center of AOYUS (As Of Yet Unnamed Snake--hey, how do you suppose you pronounce that? Silent A maybe? Oy-us? Silent O? Ayus? Hmmm.) I feel sorry for those poor fish because, it looks like the baby may have been learning just what exactly he's supposed to do with fish. The one that is still alive is laboring rather hard for every breath. The little orange one lost his life for no good reason. And the silver one, well, he is now just a lump.

I'm not a fan of feeding live animals to other animals. But, in the absence of a human baby in my home, I'll turn my attention elsewhere. In this case, apparently even a baby snake can kick in those maternal instincts. I rejoiced that he'd eaten.

Me: He ate. Now we can keep him!
Troy: My mom wouldn't let me keep snakes when I was growing up. Now my wife won't release them!
Me: Why wouldn't she let you keep them?
Troy: She didn't like them.
Me: Oh well, that makes sense. But how can you not like snakes?

I get that it's not a good idea to harbor poisonous snakes in your home. I also understand not wanting antelope eating boas living in your basement. But I think catching a baby garter snake and getting the chance to watch it grow and change is fascinating. And, let me remind you, it practically wanted to be caught. It was all, "Hey. Here I am, coming out of your fireplace. Let me cuddle up in your lap and tickle you with my forked tongue." And I was all, "Come to mama, we need something little around here!"

So now he really needs a name. Keep those suggestions coming. I haven't settled on anything yet. And then, reaffirm our friendship. I feel like there are some of you out there who have decided that you may not want to converse with the snake charmer.

*******Edited to Add******* Oh no! I just went to see if the snake ate anymore fish and I found the third one. It has been regurgitated out of the stomach of the baby snake. The lump is gone and the fish is draped over the side of the water dish. This is a most unfortunate development.


  1. Someday you must do tadpoles. That was so much fun. Especially when they started to jump around the kitchen. So, tell Troy you come by this reptile thing naturally.

  2. I know the college biology course you took was not your favorite, but I hope your mom realizes that frogs aren't reptiles.

    The ornery son-in-law

  3. At first I wanted to tell you how crazy you are for even staying in the house where a snake (tiny or otherwise) crawled out of the wall. Let alone the fact that you want to keep it as a pet.

    But, see, now I'm gonna be up all night wondering if it ever eats anything properly.

    Where did you get the idea of feeding it goldfish anyway?

  4. That maternal instinct thing is strong in you. And as long as you don't bring AOYUS as Show and Tell to Sunday School, we're good. J

  5. I was TRYING to eat my bowl of Chicken Noodle soup when I started reading your post. Not very nice. The noodles became snakes and the carrots became little gold fish.....can no longer eat chicken noodle soup....thanks so much.

  6. no name ideas, just reaffirming our friendship. obviously, only catching up on your blog just now but am riveted by all the snake action going on here! must see what happens next.