I told you I was playing an alien in the Vacation Bible School skits.
Soora (Sue-ra) is a good alien. She's in charge of security on the space ship. She does a great deal of frantic typing on a keyboard. Yes, her yellow collar is attached with paper clips.
She talks like a computer. Most the time. When she remembers.
My husband might have hijacked my facebook page last night and set this as my profile picture. He might have then called my mom and told her to look at my page. He might have also told her that it was nice knowing her.
The kids at Vacation Bible School are hilarious. The little ones, except my son, look skeptically at me and want to make sure I'm "good" before approaching. Some of the older ones suspend their disbelief and ask me questions about Soora's planet and her way of life. This is like an improvisation dream come true.
One of the boys is not very nice. He came up to me, with a dead serious look on his face. "You're not really an alien," he accused.
"Sure. I. Am." *insert alien voice
"No you aren't. Your ears are different colors."
Oh so that's what tipped you off. "On. My. Planet. Our. Ears. Are. Two. Toned."
He blinked. Twice. Then he rolled his eyes. "You're wearing paper clips to keep the yellow thing on and I can see your hair through the cap. You aren't real."
As though any of those things actually disqualify me from being an alien. I mean, unless this kid has a PhD in extra terrestrial beings I'd say he hasn't made any really good point yet. "You. Are. Incredibly. Perceptive." I said. Annoyed. He was clearly spoiling everyone's fun.
He kept us this interrogation and as much as I tried to get him to smile or pretend, he just refused. I started wondering what in his little life has happened to make him so jaded, so incapable of make believe.
I don't want to live in a world where we can't
pretend to be Idina Menzel while we're singing into our hairbrushes at age 29 and 11 months make believe. My boys are accustomed to me prancing around the yard growling at them. They know that even though I look exactly the same as I did before dinner when I was "mommy" I am now "monster". That little boy made me sad.
But try as I might I could not get him to suspend his disbelief for one second. So when he begrudgingly walked up to have his picture taken with the cast, I did what any sensible alien from another planet would do. I gave him alien bunny ears in his photo.
He'll see the picture tonight. He'll probably be mad that the fake alien with the paper clip collar dared to give him rabbit ears.
But. I. Just. Couldn't. Help. It. It. Might. Have. Been. The. Pressure. On. My. Cranium. From. The. Red. Sparkly. Headband.