Worthy Is The Lamb

There is something so beautiful, so extremely breathtaking, about standing shoulder to shoulder with fellow believers singing to the One we worship. In college I was moved to tears as the voices of a few hundred students rang out...

Alleluia, Alleluia
For our Lord God Almighty reigns

Alleluia, Alleluia
For our Lord God Almighty reigns


We were young. The world spread before us like the Pacific Ocean. We could do anything. Be anything. The land, for four years, was ours. And our Lord God Almighty reigned.

I'm older. Twelve years, to be exact. And I stood, last night, shoulder to shoulder with fellow believers who are residing together in this land. A land that is not ours. With hands raised high we declared what we know to be true.


Alleluia, Alleluia
For our Lord God Almighty reigns

Alleluia, Alleluia
For our Lord God Almighty reigns


We were gifted tickets to the Third Day concert. They were in Orchestra. In row six. Mac Powell was, well, life size. And it took my mind off of what the Lord is taking us through.

Alleluia
Holy, Holy
Are You Lord God Almighty
Worthy is the Lamb
Worthy is the Lamb


It was medical insurance that almost kept me from Utah. I sat in my toddler son's room in California and cried when I heard the man tell me that I wasn't insurable because I had polycystic ovaries. My husband found a group, though, and this ministry happened.

It was medical insurance that kept rising. Rising. Rising. And medical insurance that we kept paying, as it rose, never quite sure what we'd cut to afford the rising costs.

It was group medical insurance that gave us a thirty day notice on Tuesday. No longer insured, as of June 1. It was individual medical insurance that told me today that I am not insurable. Because my ovaries have tiny cysts that effect nothing except my ability to bear children. Because I had a benign lump removed from my breast in October. Because I'm high risk, apparently. I'm not insurable until I've been free of PCOS and any breast issue for ten years. TEN YEARS. As if PCOS will just vanish into the night.

And it's frustrating. Because I'm big on being protected. I don't think it's fair to exclude me because of a benign breast issue. I don't think it's fair to punish me for my infertility. The anguish I've felt has been punishment enough for that.

But this sense of entitlement I have is ridiculous. Sickening, even. I've seen pictures of dying children in third world countries who do not expect health insurance. I know God doesn't love me anymore than He loves them so why should I expect health care as if it is somehow owed to me. It isn't. The sooner I can get over my western, pretentious, self entitled way of thinking, the better.

Alleluia
Holy, Holy
Are you Lord God Almighty
Worthy is the Lamb
Worthy is the Lamb


My children and my husband are insurable. Praise God.

I'm exploring my options. Praise God.

Worthy is the Lamb.


Regardless. Even when things don't fit my idea of fair. I've seen miracles in my thirty years. I've seen God. May He be glorified in all things. Always.

Worthy is the Lamb.
Amen.