$13,750-- Went to our facilitator. This money is non-refundable. However, if we pursue another adoption in the future, it will be applied to that adoption. We would not have to come up with this money again. If we do not adopt in the future, we know that this money will go toward helping other Christian families bring their children home. Additionally, we could not be more proud of our facilitating ministry and the care that they have shown to us and to Kate's birth parents. They have been truly amazing and have become dear friends to us.
$6,000-- Was paid in legal fees. One of our attorneys already refunded us a large part of our retainer and the other one is in the process of refunding us. This is a HUGE blessing as we had taken out a substantial loan to be able to make appropriate adoption related payments in a timely manner. It will help tremendously in our ability to pay our loan off as fast as possible.
$6,000-- Was paid in birth mother living expenses. This is obviously non-refundable.
$1,000-- Home study costs.
$3,000-- (Approximate) Death and burial costs. This is incredibly low and was kept so low by the generosity of the mortuary and the cemetery where Kate was buried.
Total: (Approximately) $29,750
WHAT WAS DONATED/RETURNED:
$16,500-- (Approximate) For adoption expenses
$2700-- For burial expenses.
$4000-- (rough guess) That will be returned to us from our retainers.
Please pray that we receive the full amount in our Adopt Together fund. It is a grant program so there are no guarantees but so far we have received everything we've asked for. It would be incredibly helpful, obviously, for us to get everything that was donated in our name.
To those who donated, I want you to know that almost all of your money was used to pay our facilitator. That money will absolutely be used to put children into their forever families. A small amount of it was used to pay birth mother expenses to the woman who held Kate inside of her body for 32 and a half weeks. If you donated after Kate's death, your money went directly to her burial costs.
I want everyone to understand that we are still paying off our loan and some of the burial expenses. We had used most of our savings account to pay for the initial costs. I feel that I owe it to you to show you where your money went and for you to know that we did not keep any of it. Our fees were nearly $30,000 for a child that we never brought home but I want you to know that Kate is worth every single penny. I hope that those of you who donated, whether it was $1,000 or $1, feel like your contribution was worth while.
I do not think I will ever know the far-reaching, long lasting effects that Kate's life will have. I know that our family will never be the same. I know that I am absolutely the mother of three children--though I only have the pleasure of raising two of them. Kate brought a community of our friends, family and total strangers together. She showed people what JUST ONE DOLLAR, when added to a lot of other dollars, can do. She impacted people who never knew that an unborn baby in Riverside, CA could come to mean so much to them. She has made people question eternity. And that is the very best contribution she ever could have made. If I didn't believe in the existence of heaven and the necessity of a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, I would have no hope for where Kate is now. More than anything, I believe passionately in those things and I believe that my sweet girl is there.
The question is not why God would allow such a thing to happen. The question is why He continues to bless us, every day. The Bible says that, "Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." James 1:17. I look around me and all I see are good gifts. When I look upon Kate in her ultrasound picture, I think of what a blessing and joy she is to me. Coming down from the Father...and returning just a little sooner than I'd expected.