I'm watching the Oscars and I have decided that:
Nicole Kidman makes a very cute pregnant woman.
Cate Blanchett is amazing. I mean how does a woman become Bob Dylan. Just. I mean, how?
Katherine Hiegl's dress was wonderful but she was acting like a total nutjob.
While he's totally funny, Jon Stewart should maybe stop laughing at his own jokes. Maybe. I'm just saying.
Robert Boyle is a really cute old man. It was kind of weird that he thanked Nicole Kidman for so gracefully introducing him. But then again maybe he doesn't remember what he had for breakfast so maybe he forgot most of his speech?
Marion Cotillard. Now that surprised me. But she's gorgeous. Really and amazingly gorgeous.
Did I mention that Cate Blanchett is amazing? I maybe did but it's worth noting twice.
Jamia Simone Nash. If I could have sang like that at eleven years old I'd be...well, I don't know where I'd be but it wouldn't be sitting on my couch in Salt Lake City. I'd probably be, you know, famous. I don't know how many eleven year olds actually sing at the Oscars but I'm pretty sure I could count them on one or two fingers.
Jack Nicolson. Why does he always sit in the front row? Does he have to pay to do that? It's getting weird.
How has it been five years since Chicago won the Oscar for Best Picture? Where is the time going and why I am so very old now?
Kristin Chenoweth and Amy Adams are like actual little munchkins or tic tacs or something. I hate those dern triple threats. Especially exquisitely tiny triple threats.
I just heard Steven Spielberg say "male menopause" and, well, I have a personal problem with it.
They aren't over yet so I'm sure there is more but, given the fact I am now picturing the director of Schindler's List going through menopause, I'm going to go lay in the fetal position while I await the announce of best picture.
Um PS, why didn't Brad Renfro get his picture up there with the rest of the people who died?