That night, Troy and I climbed in bed and prayed for a whole heaping helping of the Lord's will.
And then I had one of the most (if not the most) disturbing dreams of my whole life. I dreamed that I was in some hospital somewhere and a nurse handed me an adorable baby boy. Everything was tiny and small and baby-like except that he had a full sized adult male appendage. It wasn't shocking in the dream. In the dream, it was supposed to look like that. But, upon waking up, the image was one that is not soon to be forgotten. I logically deduced that this meant the baby was a boy. Whether or not its appendage signified any prophetic word about his health was suspect.
What? You mean you don't think this was the logical interpretation of such a dream? You think I was leaping to conclusions. Whatever. Fine. Don't judge.
We packed up and headed to the mall. My mother-in-law and sister-in-law went one way. The rest of us went another. At 11:50 I felt my phone buzz. Pulling it out of my pocket I saw that I'd missed a call from my contact person. But I had a text. "Call me when you have a second I have a quick question."
I was puzzled. I crinkled my forehead and told Troy I needed to call her. He sent his dad into Barnes & Noble with our boys. I dialed.
"I'm so sorry. I'm in a mall and I didn't hear my phone," I said.
"Oh, that's okay. I just have a quick question for you."
"Okay, what's up?" I practiced my nonchalant-I'm-not-waiting-on-pins-and-needles-for-you-to-call-me-back-in-a-couple-hours-with-important-details-at-all voice.
"Are you ready for pink and tutus?"
Y'all! I WAS SO PREPARED FOR HER TO TELL ME IT WAS A BOY! SO PREPARED. (A boy with an oversized part, even.) So I said, "Whhhhhyyyy?" Because, like, what if she was being overly optimistic? What if she just really needed to know if I support the ballet? The mother's appointment wasn't scheduled for another two hours, after all.
"It's a girl!" she said.
And there I was in the mall with the doofiest grin you'd ever have seen and Troy was sitting on a bench with his head in his hands because he'd seen my grin and, surely, he was thinking of shot guns and weddings and being broke forevermore. AND I WAS WITH MY HUSBAND WHEN I GOT THE CALL BECAUSE SHE'D GONE IN EARLY!
"IS SHE HEALTHY?" Troy finally stammered from his place of wondering why his little finger was already starting to hurt.
And, yes, according to the doctor SHE is a "perfectly healthy baby girl."
(FYI: I cannot handle her adorable little crossed legs. They are the cutest things that have ever happened to the world. Tied, of course, with Garrett's little toddler rump and Matthew's ears.)
She told me that they would show our letter to the mother and get back to me when they knew anything. I thought, maybe, it could be a few days. An hour later my phone rang again.
I can't stress enough the inherent risks associated with adoption. We would never fault a mother for deciding to keep her child and this could all end with our family looking exactly like it does now. THAT REALLY COULD HAPPEN and we'd cry and mourn and learn lessons and praise God in the storm. But so far, doors have flown open. The weeks have been fast and crazy. We did not go looking for this. We were looking for an inexpensive waiting child adoption. Not a crazy lot of money infant adoption. When God opens doors, I have learned to trust Him and walk through them. We do not have this money. We don't. I've been telling people that we estimate this to be about 30K and we have NoK. We wouldn't have gone looking for another expensive adoption without securing funding. But this, quite literally, dropped into my inbox. I prayed for God to bring her to us, never dreaming of it happening in quite such a dramatic way. We're going to apply for grants and go into super fundraising mode. But Gideon defeated the Midianites with 300 men, pitchers, torches and trumpets. So we can defeat this seemingly insurmountable amount of money--because God would not call us to it if He didn't intend to show Himself in a mighty way.
Will you pray? Will you join us on this journey? Will you help us bring our daughter home?